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5 Things to Remember When Dating a Person with a Disability

The stigma towards persons with disabilities greatly affects their love life. Some people consider them not deserving of love or incapable of dating. These perceptions offer a new frontier for discrimination and complicate love and relationships for Persons With Disabilities. However, just like Persons without disabilities, persons with disabilities are fully capable of being in love. For persons without disabilities dating persons with disabilities, you should always remember five things.

dating a person with disability | © PIxabay

dating a person with disability (PIxabay)

  • 1

    You are not doing them a favor

    Due to the nature of disabilities, you may feel that your partner with a disability is not deserving of love. Consequently, you may feel you are doing them a favor by loving them. However, nothing is further from the truth. Persons with disabilities  deserve true love and affection just like any other person. Their disability is just like other characteristics, the way some people are tall, others short, some dark, and others brown. They all deserve love. Therefore, discard the perception that by dating a person with a disability, you are offering them a privilege. They are deserving of your love just as you are deserving of theirs.

  • 2

    There will be judgment and resistance.

    Persons with disabilities  face a lot of stigma because of being that way. Some people also assume that they cannot fall in love. Therefore, you can imagine the judgment and resistance that will come with you dating a person with a disability. You will not only be taking on the stigma but also trying to demystify a myth on your own. It is not an easy venture. People will judge you, discourage you, make mean comments, and make you uncomfortable for dating a person with disability. People will constantly ask you why you are dating a person with disability; yet  persons without disabilities  "are many." The judgment will sometimes extend to your partner, who people will consider the enemy who dragged you into their life. It will not be easy but do not let other people's biases prevent you from loving a person with disability  if you are attracted to them.

  • 3

    They are your partner; treat them as such

    A relationship is a partnership between two people who equally commit to that union. The same applies to a relationship where one partner is a person with disability. There may be a temptation to infantilize your partner because of their disability. The infantilizing actions include feeling sorry for them and being too helpful. Such behavior denies your partner a chance to play their part in the relationship. With their disability, your partner is fully capable of making their own decisions and seeking help when need be. Treat them, as you would like to be treated. Allow them to be themselves and to contribute to the relationship in an equal capacity with you.

  • 4

    You will need to make some adjustments

    Dating a person with disability  comes with some challenges that require you to adjust for the relationship to work. For instance, if your partner has reduced mobility, you must make advance plans for dates to ensure that venues are accessible and friendly. It also means that you may not visit some places because of accessibility challenges. Nonetheless, if your partner is a person with disability, it should not be difficult for you to adjust to such adjustments.

  • 5

    You have an opportunity to change perceptions; use it.

    Dating a person with disability  means, you have risen above the stigma and the myths surrounding their dating life. It also means that you do not care about people judging and resenting you for dating a person with disability. Dating a person with disability  means that you are an advocate for persons with disabilities. It is an opportunity to create awareness about disabilities and demystify the related myths. When people seek to know why you are dating a person with disability, it is not your opportunity to lash out at them for being judgmental, but it is your chance to educate them on disabilities. It is also an opportunity to demystify some of the myths they may have.

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